The Truth of My Purpose when My Purpose is Truth

As I think about the project I am currently creating, I realize I need to answer the question: Why am I telling this story?, to even begin, continue, and complete it. The project is a narrative piece and when and through writing my narrative I am making meaning out of the story and of myself. I am recreating history based on the past, present, and future. What function does this particular story serve to me at this particular moment?

Is the story I am currently narrating the one I want to live in? Not only is there a responsibility to an audience when writing a narrative, there is also a tremendous responsibility to oneself. Am I being responsible with my identity, with the way I want to tell and live within this particular story? Or, do I have a choice: Is there a chance that I can tell the story one way, but chose to live another once the story is out of my system? Once I have purged myself of the story - the old me - will I be able to recreate the narrative because of the practice of purging the most recent version?

I do know that one of the reasons I want to tell my story is for others to hear, learn, and possibly relate to it. I want to make a connection with others, to prevent them from living my story and for those who have lived a similar story, to offer hope and companionship.

I suppose as I continue writing what matters most is that I am currently telling my story in the most honest and truthful way I know how at the very moment my fingers move feverishly over the keys. If a stroke doesn't feel right, I can erase it and rewrite it. If I come back three weeks from now, read the narrative, and realize the story, the beliefs within the story, no longer parallel and express the purpose of sharing my story, I have author-ity to recreate it. But, first, I need to clearly identify my purpose, my reasons,for writing this story.